


you didn't connect shit

by quasistories



Category: Batman - All Media Types, 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
Genre: Bruce Wayne is a Good Parent, Conspiracy Theories, Crack Treated Seriously, Crossover, Gen, How Do I Tag, Midoriya Izuku is So Done, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Quirkless Heroes, Quirkless Midoriya Izuku, Silly
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-09
Updated: 2021-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-16 05:07:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 510
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29944947
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quasistories/pseuds/quasistories
Summary: Todoroki offers yet another theory regarding Izuku's parentage.This time, it actually holds water.Or, the obligatory Deku-is-a-Wayne fic, with all the trope-y shenanigans that come with the territory.
Relationships: Batfamily Members & Midoriya Izuku, Class 1-A & Midoriya Izuku, Midoriya Izuku & Bruce Wayne, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 41





	you didn't connect shit

Izuku seriously regretted joining the class's impromptu Presentation Club. In theory, it was fun: once a week, they’d get together in an empty classroom and show each other PowerPoint presentations on any and every topic under the sun with hilarious results.

Usually, he would laugh the loudest and be the most involved—he loved the energy of the room, the joy on his friends’ faces, all of it— but tonight, he just wanted to wither away into a pile of freckled dust.

“... and that’s why I think Midorya is Bruce Wayne’s secret love child. Thank you for your time.”

Yeah, no. He was never going to live this one down. The theory was ridiculous. Utterly ridiculous. Not only was it ridiculous, but Todoroki had actually proposed a compelling argument. That some of the others acknowledged as compelling.

Fuck.

Man, he hoped he hadn’t said that out loud.

A sharp voice cut through the excited murmuring, and Izuku released a sigh of relief.. “You’re so full of shit, IcyHot.” Wonderful. Saved by the Kacchan. At least  _ someone  _ recognized the sheer absurdity of this all. 

Bakugo was draped over a desk with his feet hooked over the top, and his typical glare seemed harsher upside down, probably because of all the blood rushing to his head. Ignoring Ida’s scolding— _ ”Language!” _ —he continued to tear into Todoroki’s presentation, and Izuku had never been happier to hear that angry gravel.

“First of all, you’re forgetting that most of Wayne’s kids are adopted. That alone pokes holes in your stupid theory, because the man obviously knows how to use a condom.”

That was true. Bruce Wayne was a serious advocate for adoption, especially adoption of Quirkless kids. Out of the seven children he had, only one was biologically his.

“ And he’s a damn celebrity; Deku’s mom is no one. It doesn’t make sense for him to fall for her when he’s got supermodel eye candy left and right.”

Well. That one stung a little. Izuku happened to think that his mother was lovely, but the point had still been made: she wasn’t exactly the type to get tangled up in celebrity shenanigans.

“I dunno, I bet she’s pretty hot—  _ ow!  _ Tsu!” Mineta groaned, rubbing the red mark on his face. Tsuyu sat next to him with a glare, which only subsided after a lisping apology. “Sorry, Midoriya. I was just tryin’ to make you feel better.”

“It’s fine.” It wasn’t fine, not really, but Izuku understood what he was trying to say.

Todoroki was still standing in front of the projector, absolutely flummoxed as Bakugo continued to yell. Everyone was fixated on the fight, which gave Izuku the perfect chance to slink back to the dorms without being noticed.

* * *

🔥❄️:  _ Hey, I’m sorry. _

Izuku scowled at his phone before hammering out a response.

🌿:  _ I know. I don’t want to talk about it _

🔥❄️: _Okay. I'll see you tomorrow._

The thought was reassuring. He'd be calmer come daylight, and the rest of the class would have already forgotten about the whole debacle.

_ Read at 22:17. _


End file.
